Freewrites 6

tired woman with coffee and air horn

I feel like I need a mental break on a regular basis, and I’m wondering is it just me or a symptom of my generation? Are we just lazy and weak?

Our parents were the kind that worked 2, 3 even 4 jobs at a time, with years going by without a holiday, yet never complained or took ‘time out’ or ‘sabbaticals’.

In my generation, we have one or two holidays a year and we are being diagnosed with depression, exhaustion, burn out etc in the thousands.

Of course the other element of it is maybe our parents did feel like that and just said nothing.

I don’t know.

All I know is that if I don’t address this issue when it regularly arises, or leave it too long before I do, I literally feel like I’m going to die…metaphorically. I feel irritable, purposeless, unresponsive and ultimately like a zombie waiting either for cogency to return or alternatively, waiting to check out of life with non-resistant finality.

Maybe it is all the digital involvement too. Which seems to be where the finger is most commonly pointed these days. It really does deaden your brain after hours and hours on these platforms or interacting on them (after the initial buzz), and drain you of mental and physical strength.

But I think it’s possibly unfair, and a bit lazy to blame that solely for this.

I think there’s an element of the fact we face a bagfull more pressures than possibly our parents did at the same age as us in their time. Jobs don’t come as easy, nor does buying a house, settling down, they didn’t have to pay extortionate life-debt inducing amounts for education etc etc. But then again, just because those struggles weren’t theirs at the time, doesn’t mean they didn’t face equal resistance via other struggles.

I don’t know. I don’t know what the answer is. There’s plenty of pathways I could take this thought stream down.

All I know is that I’m continuously cyclically tired, and I need several breaks a year (not necessarily abroad, more internally and mentally), to prevail in this thing called life and stay on the right side of perky.

But for the grace of God.

I thank God for my prayers that catch me just before I’m about to keel over into an abyss.

I thank God for equilibrium.

Yours Truly

xx

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5 thoughts on “Freewrites 6

  1. It’s okay not to be okay. Uhm, anyway, always remember that every beginning is difficult and you are not the only one who has that kind of feeling. Things will going to be alright soon, just hang on and keep praying πŸ™‚
    I’ll pray for you, too. God Bless! πŸ™‚

  2. I was telling Rom the same thing the other day. I am constantly tired. Exhausted, physically, mentally. But then that feeling doesn’t always last long – the next day I can just brush it off and be really upbeat and ready to take on the world again. Then one thing happens, whether it’s to do with life, work (or lack of), drama, family, social media (yes, sometimes!), or what’s going on in the world… and I get this HUGE feeling of helplessness, fatigue – like I just wanna give up – a feeling of “I can’t be bothered with this life anymore” lol… I dunno… I wish I could travel more, to take a break once in a while. But then when you come back, you’re back to square one. With a refreshed mind, yes, but still having to deal with the same stuff everyday! oh well. Probably overthinking this. *goes for a nap*

    • I hear that. The ‘here today, gone tomorrow’ type of fatigue. That’s an exhausting cycle in itself, but it sometimes helps in terms of not every consecutive day being a drag.

      What I’ve started to take more seriously is what I put in now that I acknowledge that world issues drag me down quite a bit. Literally these days, I just skip past it -the bad stuff – on social media, anywhere. Not because I don’t care, but because I don’t have the capacity to 24/7. I just can’t. And I accept it.

      I’m LAUGHING at your nap comment, but let me tell you…sometimes a nap does the ting! Hand on my heart. All of a sudden what was previously perceived as a huge crisis, becomes a small solvable problem. Too many times a nap has done that for me. Sleep is important yo!

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